Aching Brain

It’s hard to believe just how difficult a Nintendo Wii is to acquire. I made a vague stab on release day, trawling the electronics drags on Tottenham Court Road and Oxford Street. Everywhere I was greeted with smirks, and laughter accompanied by pointing and other gesticulation. The guy I spoke to in Virgin Megastore looked like he was going to hit me.

So I thought I’d leave it for a bit until the demand died down. It’s just a new games console whose sales are feeding of the intense hype surrounding it. It will sort itself out after a month or so.

On Saturday while ktm was queueing in Argos for a replacement bathroom light (it’s a rented property - what, you want us to go to Habitat?), I nipped out to see if, on the off chance, there was any Wii in Woolworths.

No

I was told, but I could order one. How long?

3-5 days, if they are in stock

said the pimply faced youth. Wicked, I think. So I queued to be greeted by the very same PFY at the counter.

Ah, you want a Wii. I’ll just pull it up on the computer. Oh, they are out of stock. My gosh! You can’t even order them!.

My gosh indeed.

So to WHSmiths. Nope. To Dixons. Nope. Return to Argos. Nope. Having picked up the better half, we headed back to Dixons in search of a FM radio aerial and I took the opportunity to quiz a member of staff on their availability. Nope. I thought I might as well go for it and ask if I could order or join some sort of waiting list. She laughed.

We got a couple in last week, but we are still filling our pre-orders.

!

From November

!!

There are Wii available, however. Game’s online store occasionally has stock. However they are opportunist bastards and only sell the console in a bundle with four non-discounted games. Then again I did really want one and the games it comes with are rather good. I took one for the team.

Having come into possession of possibly the most elusive bit of gaming kit currently on the market (save a copy of Duke Nukem Forever) I thought it would be an easy ride from here on in.

The thing is, I haven’t told ktm that there’s a Wii arriving at some point in the near future*. Consequently, I need to be able to placate her when it arrives. This may be possible via a game or two of Wii tennis. For this, as any 12 year old will be able to tell you, I need two controllers, or Wiimotes to use the approved lingo, and the console only comes with one. I stepped out of my Wii owning friend’s trendy Farringdon design studio at lunch time to attempt to locate a second of these fabled devices.

Dixons. Nope. WHSmiths. Nope. Hmm, not so good. Having exhausted the local possibilities, I resolved to head to Oxford Street after work. Virgin Megastore. Nope. Dixons. Nope. Game. Nope. HMV. Nope.

Against my better judgement, I tried some of the little nameless electronics stores at the bottom of Tottenham Court Road who take no greater pleasure than in ripping off gadget crazed geeks with their inter-shop price fixing database. No Wiimotes there either.

?!?@?!?!?@?!

Urgh, this was becoming a little silly.

Since every major store and most minor ones have come up empty, I was forced to try the black market. Computer Exchange.

Yes, we have one Wiimote in stock, but it’s ¬£35

the little goth pixie behind the counter tells me.

??!?!?!??!!@@@@?!?@1/

I looked at her incredulously, trying to come with some counter argument about how dare they have the nerve to sell me a second hand controller at above RRP. She stared blankly back at me. I opened my mouth. She put her hand on her hip and tilted her head slightly, as if she was about to begin lecturing me on market forces dictating the price of goods in a free market. ktm’s disapproving look as I open the box from Parcel Farce loomed out of my imagination. All right, I’ll have it, I grumble. When I protest sarcastically at the lack of box, the happy capitalist goth chirpily informs me that there’s a one year guarantee. Hooray. I grab the bag and walk out.

I can’t help but feel ever so slightly taken advantage of.

* = It’s just possible that I may have blown my cover

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